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It is crazy to think about where I was a year ago today.

I was in the midst of my last year at undergrad trying to figure out the next steps for my life.

This time last year I had just returned from Washington from my interview day and I was overwhelmed.

I had no idea if this is really what I wanted for my life.

Move across the country?

From family and friends?

From familiarity?

To say I was freaking out would be an understatement.

I was terrified.

Probably because I knew I would move across the country from everything I knew if I got a letter saying I was accepted.

And obviously, by now, you know I did just that.

I up and moved to this state I fell in love with.

The whole thing still blows my mind.

I am still stunned every time I see Mt. Rainier.

I am still shocked when I look at the weather forecast and see a week full of rain ahead of me.

I still have yet to wear my rain boots on the rainy days.

I still can't believe that I find myself at Starbucks frequently each week writing papers or doing readings for class.

It's just plain weird and what is even more weird is the I'm adjusted.

The idea of going home for Christmas for two weeks seems too long because it means being gone from my new home. (It's also difficult to pack for two weeks with two carry-on's!).

This is my home.

Anderson is home.

Greenwood is home.

Is it possible for the heart to have so many homes?

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The Girl in the Window Sill

She climbs onto the sill and sits looking out the window. 

She watches the people move about, the cars pass by, and sun-rise turn to sun-set. 

She sits thinking about all the possibilities in her life. 

What will I do when my time is done here?

Will this be my home forever?

What significant things will happen in the next three years?

She thinks about the past and how it has brought her to where she is today.

Because of him I learned how to move on.

Because of her I know what a true friend looks like.

Because of family, I have learned to how to love imperfect people.

And as she thinks her mind wanders in and out of many thoughts.

She catches herself sometimes and reminds herself to just breathe.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

As she breathes, she's reminded of the goodness.

The goodness of having another day to start again.

The goodness of community.

Of love.

Of faith.

Of hope.

And she finds herself happy.

--I was inspired to take a break from school and throw myself into writing. To write about this girl that I may wish was me or includes many parts of myself. Sometimes there is just beauty in being willing to enter into writing without having any idea where the words will flow.--

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MIA Blogger

So I realize I have been missing from the blogging world lately.

Yes, I have been writing a post every few weeks because that is all I can really handle in my life at the moment. School asks a lot of me and requires I do a lot of personal work which is not easy.

I spend most of my days just exhausted--sometimes its physically, other times mentally, and most of the time emotionally. When I think about writing a post, I just cannot even comprehend what to write about.

I guess I want to apologize, but I also do not want to. I think taking a break from blogging every day has been good. I read a quote today that said those who take time to write usually are more profound than those who find it easy to write. I am not saying those who have lots to say are not profound, but this is a quote that seems to be reflecting my life lately.

I write paper after paper and my words are becoming few. So many thoughts come out of my mind each week that it is sometimes too difficult to engage in anything else. I do want to say thank you to all of you though. Coming and reading your posts gives me a break from school and allows me to find rest. Most of the time it brings laughter and a smile to my face which I am so appreciative of. 

I am not sure if I will ever return to my "blog post every day" day's. For now, blogging when I feel truly inspired will have to be enough and I am okay with that.

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November Goals

It has been a while since I have done a monthly goal list.

Life has been so busy that it has been difficult to do much more than just breathe and survive. 

But I am finally in a routine and probably able to accomplish something.

1.) Be thankful--it is the month of thanks and I want to do a better job at expressing it this month.

2.) Save more, spend less--I am keeping track of all my expenses this month to see how much money I am wasting. It's November 4th and I've already spent a butt-load of money. Someone needs to get their act together.

3.) Spend time with those I love-- I finally live in near some of my favorite people and I have been doing a horrible job at seeing them.

4.) Live for the spontaneity of life--I want to get back into welcoming unexpected conversations, random adventures, and a life that is not always planned to the minute. 

5.) Come up with Christmas gift ideas for the family--can you believe it is almost here?

I think that's a pretty good list to start with.

Just some monthly encouragement!

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Someday I will...

If you've never read The Daily Tay's blog, then today is the day to do it.

I am so excited to link-up with her!

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="http://www.thedailytay.com/" title="The Daily Tay"><img src="http://i1285.photobucket.com/albums/a595/helenesula/somedayiwill_zpscd21806a.png" alt="The Daily Tay" style="border:none;" />

Someday I will...play my guitar and sing at an open mic night.

Someday I will...be a soccer mom and teach my kids how not to be an angry player and to enjoy the game.

Someday I will...complete everything on my to-do list for the day and then reward myself with a shopping trip to target.

Speaking of target, Someday I will...walk into the store and buy whatever I want without thinking about how much I am spending.

Someday I will...learn how to walk into a church without feeling like everyone in the building is going to hurt me.

Someday I will...work with teens again and be reminded of the passion I have for their generation.

Someday I will...spend all day reading a book in a hammock not on the beach but in the woods.

Someday I will...cook an entire thanksgiving dinner and not poison anyone who eats it.

Someday I will...think of more things I would like to do today, but today is definitely not that day. 

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Integration of Faith and Career

If you did not know, I am going to graduate school to receive my masters in Counseling Psychology. I am also attending a school that integrates faith into my classes. I have had a lot of questions on why this is important to me and today in class I realized why. 

If I did not believe in the Resurrection of Jesus, then I could not be a counselor. 

Now I am not saying you can only counsel people if you believe in God. I am saying that I could not counsel people if I did not believe in God.

I realize that as a counselor I have to believe my clients can die to their habits, tragedy, issues, whatever you want to call it. And then I need to believe they can rise again from death. 

If you are not tracking with me, then I am sorry. Putting this idea to words is difficult.

To make more sense I will give you an example from my life:

My first few weeks in Seattle were more difficult than I expected. I did not realize until lately that I had entered into depression and it was taking me to my grave. It seeped into every aspect of my life and I lost a little bit of who I was. Then one day the depression ended-it entered its death and I rose again back to the person I remember. 

The Resurrection story is so important to my career. 

I'm curious on how faith is integrated into your own career.

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Thankfulness

I was asked in class today to live a life that takes the mundane and see the extraordinary in it.

So here it goes:

Time to try new experiences and build new relationships.

Skype sessions with my brother and our bond over AU.

Rainy days for the renewal they bring.

Brakes that stop at just right moment when you are hydroplaning.

Quality conversations filled with honesty. 

Driving and having the privilege to do it. 

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