Women vs. Men

Sometimes we have a lot of free time during our serving shifts and we of course have various conversations. This week four of us talked about the differences between males and females when it came to giving checks at the tables. We concluded that females split checks while males just take one check. So of course we asked, why do women do that? And we concluded it is because women do not want to feel like they owe anyone anything.

I began to think about my own life and whether this is true. Do I not want to owe anyone anything? I thought about my closest friendships and I did not see this applying. My best friend and I take turns paying for things; we have an understanding that the other will have our back if we need it.

It seems like women have a lack of trust for each other and I wonder why. Shouldn't we come together as a gender and support each other and have faith in each other? What happened to the trust? When did we stop supporting each other?

I am not saying this one instance speaks to all levels of trust, but I am slowly realizing that women are missing the trust. We are more of an individualistic community rather than a collectivist and I think we need to move more toward the collectivist side. We need to believe and have faith in each other and work towards bettering everyone and not just ourselves.

Just a thought on humanity and what's to come.

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Country Music Lovin'

I do not know what it is, but there is something about the spring that brings out my love for country. I have been listening to country music non-stop for the last week and I am beginning to semi-hate the fact that I will be living in a city for the next 3 years. Thank God Washington has water, mountains, and a city. I can just drive to whatever I'm needing.

If you are in a country mood, these are the songs I suggest.

 Wanted by Hunter Hayes.

Crazy Girl by Eli Young Band

 Drunk On You by Luke Bryan

Somebody's Heartbreak by Hunter Hayes

Gimmie that Girl by Joe Nichols

Just to start you off. It may be cold, but it never hurts to roll your window down and sing one country song on the top of your lungs to remind you its spring time.

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Movie Review: Mona Lisa Smile

Here is to my movie week with Netflix. I have watched the movie and written down quotes or thoughts about it.

"Is that my file? What's it say?"

Why do the words on a piece of paper define us. Resume's, applications, biographies, etc. They all have to find a way to describe us. But what if we could just be us and present ourselves without having a definition. What makes me good or bad? Who gets to be the person to define me; who is qualified?

"What law school?" "Well, I hadn't really though much about it because when I graduate I will be married." "And?" "Well, I'll be married."

I am so thankful my parents instilled in me that I should always chase my dreams. While marriage is something I want eventually, I want to do what makes me happy. If that is being married, then so be it, but right now it is going to Seattle and getting my masters.

"I know I make mistakes, but I never make them twice."
Oh, how I wish this was true. Maybe not all mistakes are made twice, but there sure are some that I keep making over and over again. Thank God for forgiveness.


To have the faith to stand up for what you believe in and not let others get in your way.

I think my art teacher is starting to rub off on me because I loved the women defending themselves and doing what they chose to do.

This movie was great and is now on my favorites list. I suggest you go watch it if you want a netflix movie to watch.

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Urband Dictionary

In high school, Urban Dictionary was the thing to do. So I decided to take a walk down memory lane and re-visit what my name means.

1.) The most edible female name.

Well, no one has yet to tell me I have the most edible name yet. I'm sure my boyfriend will now that he's read this.

2. A smart, sassy, and sexy young woman who knows things from fashion to film to literature, from Manolo Blahniks to Mahatma Gandhi.

Smart, sassy, and sexy-Definitely the 3 S's to describe me.

3.) Hebrew name meaning "an ewe," or "little lamb." Symbolizes purity.

Well seeing as I took a vow to purity I think this got it right.

4.) A girl who isn't afraid to speak her mind or be herself. Watch out boys, she's a heart-breaker. A girl who won't settle for anything but the best, but rightfully so. She doesn't need a man to have a good time.

I do like to think I am okay being single. But heart-breaker? We might be pushing it.

5.) She's the friend you call at 2 a.m. when you need someone to tell you that every thing's going to be ok. Sweet, comforting, and a great listener.

Maybe not at 2 a.m. but I'd like to think you could call me and I will listen to you and help you in whatever way I can.

6.) A Rachel is a kind, caring, sweet person. She can come off as naive at first, but if you get to know her, you will realize that she know's a lot. A Rachel is a great person to have fun with. Sarcastic at times, but not in a mean way. A Rachel is a great friend, and would die for her best friends. She worries about her friends and family, and is scared that something will happen to them. She does what she thinks can help, and is great for giving advise to people, not so great at following her own advise. Sometimes Rachel's are misunderstood, and sensitive to little things. Although sensitive, she will defend herself and it is not a good idea to get on the bad side of a Rachel. With a creative mind, and a wild imagination, a Rachel can use her mad ideas for creative things, as well as plans for revenge. She will defend her music, art, friends and family like her life depended on it. Usually an animal lover, and great at art, a Rachel is a smart, loyal, caring person, who will listen to people complaining about everything and not wish to interrupt with her problems. She can be shy and quiet but is usually hyper and loud, with her friends. She will love to laugh and says the wackiest things, to make people laugh. She is an amazing person, with sparkling eyes and a thin small frame. Cute, cuddly, huggable and sweet, a Rachel is an amazing person to know, and better yet to be friends with, as she cares for everyone's problems.

Well I think that one nailed me on the dot.



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Spring Break 2013

Well it is spring break for me which means I am spending the week trying to stay afloat.

 

I have spent the last three days working double and triple shifts along with looking for barista jobs for the summer.

 

With that said, I am going to spend my time this week being away from my blog to enjoy time with family, my friends, my boyfriend, and my favorite little thing called Netflix.

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Gratefulness

The Daily Tay 

is a blogger that I follow in blog land and she posted this amazing post yesterday from another blogger.

I was touched deeply by it and I think it is a great reminder that we have much to be thankful for.

Give it a read and be blessed.

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Defending Yourself

Some weeks I find a re-occurring theme going on in my life. This week it has been the idea of defending yourself or your thoughts and beliefs. I am in a class where I train students interpersonal skills and this week it was responding to defensiveness. I also have been having to defend myself in my Women in the Arts class. My professor gave us a test last week that we just turned in this week. I expressed my frustration with her answer key last week as she disagree with answers that were in the book which was our source to study from.

 

After a heated discussion she let the class go and pulled me aside to discuss my frustration. To be honest, I left the room annoyed and quite angry with her. It seemed like she thought I was the only one with the problem and that I was not understanding what she was saying. I never said I did not understand, but that I did not agree. She came back with saying I needed to defend myself. I stepped back trying to distance myself from my teacher because I was defending myself and realized the conversation was going nowhere.

 

Yesterday she chose a video to watch in class and spoke to me individually. The conversation was odd again. It seemed to me that she chose the video directly because of me and we came back to me not understanding again.

 

I felt at a loss with this woman. I was trying to defend myself and she continued to keep telling me to defend my beliefs. We have spent a lot of class time talking about how we have to defend ourselves as women since men have more power in this world, but I realized how much we have to defend ourselves with other women. I do believe women have to work hard in this world due to our continuance of trying to have equality with men; however, I think we need to remember whom we may be pushing out of the way as we defend ourselves. Are we pushing other women away? Putting them down? Where is the real power struggle?

 

I guess my point is that you should always stand up for what you believe in and own your opinion, but be aware of how your defense may attack another's. 

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The Evolution of Time

My roommate and I have been talking about how we have changed over the last for years. We've changed personality wise, look wise, and faith wise.

 

Freshman year:

My style was jeans and sweat shirts. I was studying youth leadership. I dated a guy named Trent who went to a different school and I spend the majority of my weekends at AU or in Angola. I went to Zumba every Thursday at 5 p.m., Floor Dinner on Monday's, and bible study on Wednesday. My favorite class was with Todd Faulkner teaching Into to Church Ministries which I took with Tessa. The biggest lesson I learned is to be carefree and have fun. I really lived up this year.

 

Sophomore Year:

Well this was an interesting year. I served on leadership staff as a Discipleship Coordinator. I changed my major to Psychology and Business Management. I lived the single life this year and tried developing friendships. We became friends with some pretty cool people and we lost some friendships. Biggest lesson: God sends some big waves to rock your boat, but if you hold on long enough he pulls you through.

 



Junior Year:

The year of surprises! Michelle was pregnant, I decided I wanted to move to Washington, and some more drama filled our lives. I was a Psychology and now a Business Administration major. We took a trip to California and welcomed in a new member to our friendship. Biggest life lesson: Three strands are not easily broken.

Senior Year:

The year of hair change-light brown, red, to dark brown. Business and Psychology major. Lightest semester loads. Took a week off from school to complete my graduate school interview. Met a boy at a party who after a few months turned into the guy I am dating. I make the big decisions to move to Washington for grad school. Spontaneity and living life up is of importance. Biggest life lesson: Sometimes your plans change, be willing to see where life takes you.

 



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Music I love lately and a blast from the past

I don't know what it is about the first two lines of this song, but I love them.

"All along it was a fever; a cold sweat hot-headed believer."

 

Oh boy, Bruno Mars you got me with this song. So good!

 

Love these two together!

 

This is my adorable little brother and his friend from four summers ago. Oh how time flies!



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Pinterest

Coffee Brownies, yum!

Nice idea for a ring

I am dying to have this!

So doing this for a kids room!

I think I'm in love with this!

This is how I want to start my trip to England and Seattle!

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Trust

In my Organization Behavior class yesterday, we talked about the issue of trust.

This sparked a question in my head: Do we give our trust or loan it?

My teacher believes in loaning our trust meaning we can take it back at any instance. While I see his point, I am not sure how you can truly trust someone when you are waiting to have to take it back. It's kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy in its self. If I think you're going to lose my trust, then I am going to be on the lookout for the instance to take it away from you.

I lean on the side that trust is something you give with no take-backs. I think trust has to be given without expecting anything in return. It is a gift of saying I have faith in you, in this friendship, in this relationship, etc. After giving it, it comes down to the other person deciding on how they want to use it. They can either cherish and demonstrate the trust you have in them or they can let it fade away which usually means a fade away in the relationship.

I really only started thinking like this today. I've never really put much thought into trust other than that fact it can disappear very quickly. 

I'm curious of what you think. Do you believe its something you loan out or something you give without expectations?

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Shaken Faith

I am sure I have blogged about this before, but I was reminded on how true this story has affected my spiritual life.

Sophomore year of college my dad lost his job from the church and I lost my faith in God. During the year my leadership role on campus was to be the spiritual leader on my hall which meant planning a weekly bible study for 16 girls. These girls had strong faiths or desires to grow in their walk in God; they were looking to be fed spiritually. I, on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with God, church, or spirituality. I also did not want to give up my position and let my girls down.

How can you lead? What are your qualifications now? You can't do this; you'll send the wrong message.

These were the thoughts running through my head. I really had no idea what to do, but I knew I did not have the strength to plan a bible study each week that left an impact. A song about stories touch my heart and I thought, "What if I bring in others to share the faith walk, their struggles, their successes?"

And that is what I did, for the entire semester I had someone I knew come in and share their spiritual story. We heard about divorce, addiction, loneliness, spiritual highs, spiritual lows, and so much more. It was exactly what our floor needed. They needed diversity and ways to connect their stories to someone else. It was moving for them and for me. I ended the last bible study explaining to the girls my spiritual struggle and what I was going through. Little did I know the other girls had similar experiences.

Despite the fact my faith was shaken, I was able to lead and minister through my pain. I am reminded of this event any time I feel like I am being beaten down. My pain has beauty, your pain has beauty; weaving them together produces a beautiful tapestry of love.

Never let your pain keep your from being led or leading.

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Summer To-Do List

So I have been thinking about this coming Summer and what I will do with my last official Summer Break which means 4 months of no school.

1.) Get a tattoo with my best friend before she moves to California. I have been wanting to get a tattoo for a while now, but my parents made a rule that I do not get piercings or tattoo's while I am in college. Well, I graduate in May and I want my best friend who has multiple tattoo's to be there with me. I am wanting an anchor with either the word love in it or under it. It will represent being anchored in love for me and a sign of my faith.

There are some of the places I've considered getting it.

2.) Simplify my live: I have collected a lot over the years and I have to figure out how to pack up my entire life and possibly fit it into my four door car which means very little can go. Of course, I know my parents will still let me store some of my stuff with them, but I know I have a lot of stuff I do not need.

3.) Bake some of the delicious recipes on Pinterest that I have pinned. When I get to Seattle, I want a cookbook of dishes that are my go to dinners, lunches, or snacks. I already love Million Dollar Spaghetti, but I need more!

4.) Visit the Indianapolis Public Library and Read for as long as necessary. This past summer I stopped into this library for my friend to print her resume and my jaw dropped. The place is huge, has comfy sitting, and has way too much exploring to be done that I have yet to do.

5.) Go to an Indianapolis Indians game. Man, we used to spend our summers going to as many games as possible. I am not that into sports, but get me to a game and I will be hooting and hollering with the rest of them.


Seems like a short list, but I know I will think of more by the time May gets here!
Oh and let me just say Thank You Lord for tax refunds because stress to pay for tuition was just lowered and is easier to pay off by may!

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