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Thursday, February 24, 2011

God is good!

I would just like to say God is good! I will be spending my summer Washington working as a camp counselor. I am beyond excited and cannot wait to see what happened in the three months that I am there. This time last year I would have never thought anything good would come from waiting on his call, but I am a living testimony of that. God is good! All the time! Pin It

Day 27: The friendliest person you knew only for a day

Dear girl I housed,

You were seriously the kindest person I've met! I wish you came to school with us and hopefully we will be lucky to have you walking around campus with us next year. You inspire me to try and be as friendly as you were and be able to deliver that same message to someone who only knows me for a day. I still remember everything about that night from doing your hair to watching the orphan. I hope your senior year is going well and I really hope you decide to come to Anderson next year! Pin It

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Day 26: Dear person that I pinky promised last

Dear rooms,

Remember when we pinky promised the other week while playing games after blind date night? I love you so much roomie! We have such a good time together and I am blessed beyond words with you! I never knew we would grow so close or end up rooming together every year, but I never would change a thing. I am so excited for two more exciting, crazy, and spontaneous years together. Pin It

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Day 25: Person I know is having the hardest time

Dear you,

You are strong, confident, beautiful, and truly amazing. It may seem like life is not worth it at the moment, but keep carrying on. The sun has just set, but it will rise. It will rise and shine again for you. Each step is taking you to the place you are meant to go. There is no wrong path for that path is taking you to the right path. Don't stop moving; keep picking up each foot one day at a time. Don't loose hope or faith, instead devote yourself to your faith and rely deeply on that. Cry when you need to, laugh when you need to, yell when you need too, and smile even in the midst of your tears. "Whether you turn to the right or the left, you will hear a voice behind you saying 'this is the way; walk in it." Isaiah 30:21 Take your time lovely!

You may seem like these feelings will stay forever, but one day you'll wake up just like me and realize today is the day to officially say goodbye. Maybe that day is today, tomorrow, a month from now, or a year from now. Whenever it is, it will come and we will all be here waiting for you and your timing.

If anything, remember we love you, through thick and thin, rain or shine, we are here.

"There's a better version of me that I can't quite see, but things are gonna change. Right now I'm a total mess and right now I'm completely incomplete, but things are gonna change cause you're not through with me yet. This is redemption's story with every step that I'm taking. Every day I'm chipping away what I don't need. This is me under construction, this is my pride being broken. And every day I'm closer to who I'm meant to be. I'm a change in the making." Pin It

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Day 24: Dear person who gave me my favorite memory

Dear Nan,

I just love the memories we share and I couldn't just pick one favorite. They're all my favorite. You're my best friend and I love you so much. As I get older, I realize out times together are slowly fading away from us and I wish you lived closer so we could spend more time together. I feel like we are twins in so many ways. We love to have fun, write, play cards, and watch TV shows that we try to discover the answer too. Your bold and have a servant's heart and man, I just love you. I don't think I can say it enough, but I love you, I love you, I love you!!!

There's the memories with the shooting peas, locking the keys in the car, shopping so many times together, making up Rachel Rummy, sharing a room together for 3 months, and so many more!

Love you! Pin It

Monday, February 7, 2011

Day 23: The Last Person You Kissed

Dear T*,

I'm tired of writing about you. I'm done, I'm over it, and I can finally say that I am 100% moved on from you. Pin It

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Day 22: Dear someone I want to give a second chance

Dear L*,

I know you thought you were just doing what you needed to do, but I didn't agree with the way you handled things. But I am willing to give you a second chance. You didn't do this to me, but I believe you can be a good person and can provide grace. Just remember that there are people watching and treat others how you want to be treated Pin It

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

What was I created to be?

It seems I am always asking what I was created to be? Why was I put here? What's my purpose; mission? Why are my two feet walking on this earth?

I guess I just keep asking myself this because I keep referring to myself as a sinner. A sinner for participating in activities I know are wrong. A sinner for wanting to give up on the church. A sinner for not wanting to be a leader anymore. A sinner for wanting to hate people. I am a sinner.

But so is everyone else, right?

Maybe that's why I get lost. I'm fighting all these battles by myself because I'm afraid to share it with people. What if they judge me? What if they tell me to turn to God? You know, I get it! I've been a Christian for over 10 years now and I know you are supposed to repent and ask for forgiveness, but sometimes it just gets old. I feel like I have used all my turn to ask for forgiveness. Shouldn't their be a point where God says, "You've taken advantage of me enough times, so sorry, kid, you're out of luck this time?" I mean I would totally understand if he said that. I'd do the same thing. "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me." Isn't enough, enough?

Now why can't enough be enough for me? Why can't I stop after the first time? I guess it's just like Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. Once you take the bite of the sweet fruit it's hard not to keep going to back for more bites and eventually you just forget you are even taking that bite. I constantly wonder how much life would be easier if they would have never sinned. But then again would we learn everything we do if we had never sinned? Is sin something to be thankful for?

I think most of this is stemming from the past month of losing a church, a church family, and hope/faith in the church. I start to wonder what's the point and with that it is hard not to question your faith and why you believe. I still love God and believe in him, but I am struggling with how everything has happened in the last month as it has. Why God? Why us? But when I say why us, I wonder why Abraham. Joseph, Mary? Why did he choose them? Is this why we were created? Did you allow this to happen to us because you knew we could handle it or fight through it?

And then this song comes to my mind, and I here God talking to me:

Come home, come home
Cause I've been waiting for ya for so long, for so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all I see is you and me
And the fight for you is all I've ever known
So come home

And then I hear me talking to God:

Everything I can't be is everything you should be
And that's why I need you here
Everything I can't be is everything you should be
And that;s why I need you here Pin It

Day 21: Someone I judged by first impression

Dear S*,

The very first moment I met you I never thought we would be friends. Oh how I was wrong! You are now one of my very best friends. I can't imagine you not being in my life now. I have loved watching you grow and seeing you become the person you are today. It's only been about 5 months, but you have changed dramatically and I cannot wait to see how you continue to change and grow. You have such a heart to learn and grow and I can't say it enough. I'm just so excited for you, your life, and our friendship. I love you girl! Pin It