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Monday, June 15, 2015

What I Learned from a Year of Counseling

Today I finished my 40th hour of counseling required of my masters program. Since last July, I have been seeing the same woman every Monday at 10 a.m. I'll be honest and say it was not always easy. When is working on improving who you are ever easy? But I will say it is worth it. A year of counseling teaches you a lot and today I share some of the things I've discovered.



1.    It is possible for a stranger to see who you truly are.
            -I was skeptical at times with my counselor. I thought "There's no way this lady really knows all of me and can even begin the life I've traveled." And guess what, she never admitted she did know all of me or could understand the live I've traveled. She did try to know all of me and try to see life from my shoes. A complete stranger cared enough about me to try and sometimes trying makes all the difference.

2. Whether you think you need counseling or not, just do it.
            -There were so many times I was ready to quit. Some days I felt like I was digging for anything to talk about and other days I had a list of things. But even on those days I felt I had nothing to bring, there was something there. Sometimes it was something I was not saying, sometimes it was something in my unconscious, and often it was just myself lying to myself that I was fine and did not need someone to talk to.

3. It is NOT about the other.
            -What I mean by this is that counseling is not about fixing the other, you know that person who cut you off in traffic, or your mom who yelled at you again, or your boyfriend who cheated on you for the 5th time (Just so you know these do not refer to me, just topics that can come up in counseling). Counseling is about you. It is about exploring who you are, learning your style of relating, discovering more about yourself that you did not know existed, and being real and honest about your life. It is not about your counselor and their agenda; it is simply for you and what you desire.

4. Push through.
            -I learned that if it is not important to me that I will give it up very easily. There were many Monday's where counseling was not a priority for me, but I came. Often I complained about how it was frustrating to be doing something that I am not necessarily choosing. But I pushed through and learned that this is a way I hide sometimes. If you feel like giving it up, maybe it is time for you to give it up, but challenge yourself to push through and I bet you'll discover something about yourself you did not know was there.

5. You're okay.
            -To hear someone say "You're okay" is a beautiful, caring statement. It rings in your ears as acceptance of who you are. It gives you hope that you will overcome or work through whatever is going on in your life. And it gives you some peace about life.

6. The tissue box may become your best friend.

            -Thank God for Kleenexes and a counselor who places them in a convenient place. Welcome this box and accept it. It is there to heal, to hold, and to let you breathe. 

There was so much more I learned along the way, but sharing all is not necessary.
I am thankful for this past year of self-work and having someone who met with me every Monday.
Until next time...
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1 comment:

  1. I've been in counseling for a couple of years and it's the BEST thing I could ever have done for myself. It has completely changed my life for the better.

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